FredMcKinnon.Com

Happy New Year Everyone!

This is the first time I’ve blogged since early October 2011.  The thought that my blog has been sidelined for so long is somewhat discouraging; yet, not surprising.  I wear a lot of hats and sometimes I set one aside – for a season, or forever.  I struggled over the impact it would have but realized soon enough that the simple fact that I didn’t receive a question, email, tweet, or comment about my lack of blogging was evidence enough:  I take this space and it’s influence way too seriously sometimes!  Today’s post is a wakeup for the new year and a bit of ramblings.  If you’re looking for a nice coherent post — well, I may disappoint you.

I find myself excited with each New Year because I’m a goal-setter.  I’m also a goal-maker, a goal-surpasser, and yes – a goal-misser.  I surpassed a number of goals last year but ended the year feeling a bit burned out.  A new start is good for that.

As this race called life keeps zooming by I find myself asking this question:  “who am I”?

Yes – I’m a child of God.  That’s one thing that won’t change.  Seasons in this life can drastically change how you answer that question in other areas.

Thankfully, I’m still a Husband.
Thankfully, I’m still a Father.
Thankfully, I’m still a Worship Leader.

My blog header says:
Worship Leader, Pianist, Producer, Blogger

I don’t know that I can really be identified that way anymore.  Life has changed.

I’m not really a blogger.  That’s evident in my lack of posts since October 2011.
Producer?  I still have the ear, the gift — but haven’t acted in the role of a producer in years.  YEARS.  I’m not that guy anymore.

Then, there are words that are missing:
Entrepreneur:  I love the word.  I live it.  It’s part of my DNA.
Composer:  The word isn’t there because I’ve been slack.

I suppose the question, moving forward in 2012 is this:

Who do I want to be?

1.  I want to be more devoted and close to God.  Not just a worship leader.  A worshiper.  On and off the stage.  Deeper.  More authentic.
2.  I want to be a creative artist.  I’m saddened at the lack of art that I created the past few years.   I’ve allowed too many other things to steal away more than it’s share of creative time.
3.  I want to be a much better husband and father.  This is where it really counts.

So, what about you … if you’re still there, if you still subscribe, if you’re reading this …

What do YOU want to be, or better yet, WHO do you want to be in 2012?